Stimming and Coping Mechanisms

I believe this connection sheds light on my own experiences. One behavior I've consistently engaged in is stimming, a term I became familiar with in recent years. Stimming encompasses actions such as rocking, hand-flapping, and the repetition of words or phrases. Individuals with autism often utilize stimming as a means of emotional regulation or to mitigate overwhelming stimuli. Intervention is generally unnecessary unless stimming becomes excessive, disruptive, or harmful.

Interestingly, items like fidget spinners were specifically designed for individuals with ASD. Numerous small tools exist to aid concentration on tasks without triggering a meltdown—another aspect of ASD.

Meltdowns and Sensory Overload

An autistic meltdown can manifest as yelling, rocking, crying, hitting, or withdrawing. Children and teens on the spectrum often describe the experience as accompanied by physical sensations such as tension, shortness of breath, warmth, and blurred vision. These meltdowns are often indicative of distress, typically resulting from accumulated stress over time.

For me, the lead-up to a meltdown involves feeling excessively warm and uncomfortable. It's as if pent-up energy and suppressed negative emotions create a pressure that eventually culminates in an outburst—not dangerously, but more like retreating to my room and slamming the door.

In contrast, when I'm in highly stimulating environments, I can experience a sense of vertigo. For instance, at a festival, my feelings can vary drastically between day and night; I find the daytime overwhelming but enjoy the nighttime ambiance.

Seeking Professional Validation

Ultimately, the main takeaway from my conversation with the therapist was that if I pursued a formal diagnosis for both ASD and gender dysphoria, it would likely be affirmed. I realized I truly meet all the criteria.

This realization brings me a sense of relief, almost like closing a chapter on what my parents could have done for me during my childhood. I learned that obtaining a diagnosis today costs around $200, which is surprising! My parents couldn’t have afforded such a small amount to get me the assistance I needed? It likely cost even less over 30 years ago. It seems that previous generations often dismissed "mental" issues.

Now, as I plan to return to the US next year, I need to investigate how and where I can obtain an official diagnosis, as well as how to qualify for SSI benefits. Any assistance would be invaluable.

Returning to the workforce, especially in a warehouse filled with younger individuals, will be a daunting challenge. My childhood experiences with anxiety and flight responses were significant, and many jobs I attempted left me overwhelmed to the point where I ran out on my first day. I struggled to understand those feelings, but now everything makes sense.

At jobs where I managed to stay, I often kept to myself, yet I eventually found myself in trouble for gossiping or accurately imitating my coworkers. During my last day at my previous job, it was clear some were relieved to see me go.

I believe I have a valid case for seeking a position suited for individuals with ASD through an employment service while also receiving SSI support. That would alleviate much of my stress. Now, I need to embark on my research journey, alongside finding accommodation for our potential move back to the US.

This video discusses the often missed diagnoses of ADHD and autism in both children and adults, featuring insights from Dr. Thomas E. Brown.

Explore the nuances between missed diagnoses and misdiagnoses of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) in this informative video.